burglar bar none

at least the iPod was a good idea. it meant i was one step ahead of the burglar who tonight tried to force his way into our flat via the spare room window. the modus operandi went something like this:
(a) choose a window on ground level big enough for a person to climb through
(b) wedge a crowbar or something similarly flat-pointed and sturdy between the window and the frame and apply enough force for the latch to break off
(c) lift the window open
(d) using the same implement, rest it on the window frame, wedge it underneath the burglar bars and vigorously start tugging and pushing in order to dislodge the screws fixing the bars to the wall
(e) do all this in plain view of the block of flats across the road, as nobody will notice or investigate such noises at 23h00
(f) underestimate the noise made and run away when the upstairs neighbour (bless her) pokes her head out of the window and shouts obscenities (i hope she did)

the missing section, that hopefully does not come to pass, is:
(g) wait until the police arrive to inform the neighbour that this is tonight's second break-in in the street
(h) observe them leave after making some empty promises based on their milling around for a while and saying hmmm and uhmm
(i) continue with the task at hand

hopefully it won't happen, because i want to catch some sleep. if it does, however, i would like to have a clean view of the intruding hand before i plunge my large and sharp kitchen knife into it.